for December 20, 2023
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12-20-2023 Sirach 5 V0104 I live my sin as to sustain
The Book of Sirach Ch Five v- One thru Four
1 Do not rely on your wealth, or say, “I have the power.” 2 Do not rely on your strength in following the desires of your heart. 3 Do not say, “Who can prevail against me?” for the LORD will exact punishment. 4 Do not say, “I have sinned, yet what has happened to me?” for the LORD is slow to anger!
To be addicted is to remain in sin. Most of us can say we struggled with different types of addiction based on extenuating circumstances that caused a different reflection on life. My story is hard to fathom or even discuss. The filth of the trauma alone that happened to me seems so ugly to even speak of it made me become silent for more than 33 years. It made me remain in sin to avoid discussing or even considering why I was who I was in shame. A man is a man and he must be able to protect himself. Or what had happened was my fault a deep hidden desire to live a life in ungodly ways. It created situations that made my two oldest children hate me unable to forgive. I wasn’t there when I needed to be for I was high running away from a shame I couldn’t fathom discussing or letting anyone know. I have said I’m sorry over-and-over again. Too late. They won’t answer. They remain silent. They wrote a letter and cancelled me unable to forgive. I have written about this before. What happened wasn’t intentional. It wasn’t planned. It was experienced from the effects of trauma being used and abused by another person’s desire of control. That was someone abusing me not me abusing them. I could not explain this to them. I tried but nothing but silence. One of my children has become a wealthy doctor. She can do as she pleases even if it effects her children who once called me grandpa and now see me as dead? No explanation of what she told them at three and five years old? Now five and eight. What happens on grandparent’s day at school? Do they forget about me even then? She hasn’t forgiven me she has followed her own heart and not that of true forgiveness. I never did anything to her but try and love her. After three years, they refuse to see me as I am now and not what I was. Sirach seems to be talking to them today. I remain in prayer hoping to overcome this injustice. It seems I am guilty of being Saved by Christ’s message. Something my own children can’t understand. To forgive and find freedom by accepting your soul’s Salvation. Sometimes our own message must be discussed to learn and grow in Salvation. This witness of how to overcome. To be in Truth is only hard if you allow it to consume your being. Being dead to a grandson is wrong and I continue to keep a journal writing to the boys and explaining where I have been. One day I pray they will read it and find in their hearts to forgive me as adults. Yet, I remain hopeful my son and daughter will overcome their selfishness and seek healing with me as a man of God. The only way I know how to act is to be a man of God. If they are ashamed of this, then I reflect on their need to find Redemption- Life Eternal and His peace instead obsessing with a woke agenda. Amen.
Join me as we pray our daily prayer of forgiveness. The Lord’s Prayer.
At the Savior’s command and formed by divine teaching, we dare to say:
Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name; thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Deliver us, Lord, we pray, from every evil, graciously grant peace in our days, that, by the help of your mercy, we may be always free from sin and safe from all distress, as we await the blessed hope and the coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ. For the kingdom, the power and the glory are yours now and for ever. Amen.
I am sorry Lord. I believe You died and rose for me. Please forgive me as I forgive others. I share You as my Lord and Savior seeking to live your Will in all things. Prayers for wife Toni and my mother Betty pray for our children especially our two oldest Alexandra & Allen Son in Law Mark Stern; Julian, Gabriel and Jeffrey and our grandchildren Oliver, Julian and Elliott. We pray for those we’ve said we’d pray for and those who’ve asked us to pray for them. We pray for the dying as we do each day Lord give them peace in their last breath. We pray for Holy Mother Church. Our prayers for a little boy named David Alexander. Praise God thank You Jesus. In Jesus Precious Blood by His Name we pray. Amen.
I am a poet obedient to Christ,
Catholic Evangelist Thomas Cruz†Wiggins
Practice. Pray. Proclaim. ®
†Spirit led God inspired Christ fed†®
12-20-2023 Sirach 5 v-0104
**I live my sin as to sustain**
Wealth rely power to die caught
Power have I say not
Heart desires strength rely you must stop
Say not me conquered by who all have forgot
Punishment exact the Lord has ordained
Say not I live my sin as to sustain
Happened what some have constantly complained
Anger His slow the Lord has already remained
© Thomas Joe Cruz†Wiggins
December 20, 2023 @ 05:44 AM EST
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